Every time you smile at someone, it is an action of love

Every time you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing. – Mother Teresa

Really Funny Jokes


A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, “This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.” The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, “Which do you want, son?” The boy takes the quarters and leaves. “What did I tell you?” said the barber. “That kid never learns!” Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. “Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?” The boy licked his cone and replied, “Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!”

China has a population of a billion people. One billion. That means even if you’re a one in a million kind of guy, there are still a thousand others exactly like you. (A. Whitney Brown)




Two campers are hiking in the woods when one is bitten on the rear end by a rattlesnake. "I’ll go into town for a doctor," the other says. He runs ten miles to a small town and finds the town’s only doctor, who is delivering a baby. "I can’t leave," the doctor says. ‘But here’s what to do. Take a knife, cut a little X where the bite is, suck out the poison and spit it on the ground." The guy ruins back to his friend, who is in agony. ‘What did the doctor say?" the victim asks. "He says you’re gonna die."

I went to the psychiatrist, and he says "You're crazy." I tell him I want a second opinion. He says, "Okay, you're ugly too!" (Rodney Dangerfield)




Three kids come down to the kitchen and sit around the breakfast table. The mother asks the oldest boy what he’d like to eat. "I’ll have some fuckin’ French toast," he says. The mother is outraged at his language, hits him, and sends him upstairs. She asks the middle child what he wants. "Well, I guess that leaves more fuckin’ French toast for me," he says. She is livid, smacks him, and sends him away. Finally she asks the youngest son what he wants for breakfast. "I don’t know," he says meekly, "but I definitely don’t want the fuckin’ French toast."


A guy shows up late for work. The boss yells "You should have been here at 8:30!" he replies: "Why? What happened at 8:30?"




At the airport they asked me if anybody I didn’t know gave me anything. Even the people I know don’t give me anything. (George Wallace)